Xx...我的心...xX

一颗心，如何得以衡量？
我问自己，这，不能说衡量就衡量。
心，其实并不是切开一半就是一样的体积，
一样的重量。

其实，心，
分割出来后，
滴出来的血，
是永远回不去心里。

理性，
盖过了感性。
其实，
爱上孤单的感觉。

Xx...moody...xX

Moody recently,
ok. I supposedly say...
I m being moody...
AGAIN...

these few days,
felt insecure.
is it becuz of hw?
or becuz of sth?

i did nt realize anything.

but,
pls do allow me to say...
i really nid to b in love.

Xx...almost passed 2 weeks...xX

ok, at last,
i've come back^^
First of all~
welcome myself to dis blog~
pls do applaud for me~^^

ok...
many things happen.
start fr gud news...
cuz everything should b started wif the splendid beginning~

1)i went to a music camp last week.
last tuesday till this monday.
I was one of the representative of my school n also kl.
so, our deeds should b in considered...
but at last,
3 of us(fr kl) n 4 fr the selangor...
hs bacome the craziest group><
XD no choice~
we r from band~
many happen.
n i m lazy to post those precious memory.
for me,
it was a very different experience.
i do love dis camp.
guys~i shall rmb u all the time.

2)it's hapi to b wif u...
indeed.

gud news till here
bad news.

1" cannot retake exam...
haiz...
2" someone passed away...
a senior fr my school..
felt sorry.
it happen again...
laz few months was just happen.
rite?at yu hua...
3" i m going to take muet for nov.
wish me luck...
going to die...
sooon, i mean.

k, nid to sleep.
====================
珍惜身边的每一个人，
就是对每一个人最好的交代。
不管他对你是好是坏，
这一切，
都应该永远留在心底。

Xx......xX

Xx...烦...xX

简单的说一句，
我现在的心绪，
就如我这篇文章的标题一样。

心，
有点郁闷，
但不知怎么化解。

愿，
这一切，
将躲过这片乌云。

ps:
我开始在乎我们的一切了。

Xx...有一种感觉...xX

有一种感觉，
永远只有2个人会感受到。

有一种感觉，
就只是让两个人
独自拥有。

有一种感觉，
就是让两个人都那么的开心。

有一种感觉，
就是让我们知道，
其实我们在乎对方。

对，
我知道了。
你知道吗？

Xx...exam is coming very very very sooooonnnnn...xX

tml will b the exam~
the first paper will b...
PA...
aizs...
hate exam...
a yardstick tat endure us!!!!

haiz...
can't memorize those stuff,
actually quite suffering to memorize...
cuz i hate to memorize!!!

aiz~
pma!!!
positive mental attitude!
let myself love book for this moment!

Xx...停留的回忆...xX

时间，流逝，
心，没有喘气的余地。
我，抬起头，
望着满天的繁星，
赞叹他能那么的耀眼，
他能那么的闪烁，
那么美丽。

去了新的环境，
一个月有余，
认识的朋友，
不多不少，
足以在学校吵吵闹闹，
嘻嘻哈哈，
认认真真，
地过中六的每一天。

其实，
询问自己，
到底走错了路吗？
自己好像什么都不会，
好像什么都很差。
真的有点疑惑了，
5科真的适合自己？

城镇的步伐，
极快。
几乎没有时间停顿。
来到这里，
纯粹的发泄。
因为真的好久没有发泄了。

=====================
我尝试忘记一些事情，
越刻意忘记，
越难忘记。

我尝试明白一些事情，
就在悄悄离开的同时，
我知道，
原来，
我一点也不重要。
最好，
我不存在。

我尝试让自己不去回想，
但是，
这种爱，
已经是刻骨铭心，
无法割舍。

有时，
问问自己，
你到底为了什么离开？
这时，
我才发现，
我长大了。
我不再单纯的认为他是个寄托了。
=====================
走在育华的走廊，
发现，
大家都不一样了。
人事全非，
亦不是当日的地方。

我回头望望，
这片不属于自己的寄托。
然后，
再向前走，
告诉自己，

加油，
别让学校丢脸了~

Xx...脸xx心...xX

把开心放在脸上，
把悲伤放在心里。
用红肿的眼睛，
望着镜中的开心脸孔，
这时，脑海出现一个问题，
询问着开心的脸孔，
你是谁？你快乐吗？你过得好吗？
开心的脸孔，
依旧是开心的笑脸，
然而黯然伤心的心，
却有事说不出，
只肯让自己默默承受。

伤心的心，
突然庆幸有开心的脸孔的存在，
因为他不想被任何人发现，
原来他伤心。

虽说如此，
开心的脸孔，
也有疲惫的时候，
他累了，
就沉睡在别人的记忆里。
最终，
悲伤出现了，
化成眼泪，
拯救了笑脸。

其实，
笑脸与眼泪，
都是互相依赖对方。

Xx...i lost my time when i hv missed sth...xX

sth precious,
appeared suddenly.
juz like an electrical shock,
i let it passed through my body,
without any changes in neither emotion nor heartbeat.
hence,
i've concluded,
indeed,
i'd made sth i think i will nt reach the yardstick.

Kinda stress,
indeed.
i would like to b myself,
but,
it seems tat,
it is impossible to b alone.
this is nt a sad emotion.
but,
juz a very very very...
needed to express.

actually
i like the life at here.
i love to go to school to meet everyone in my school.
i like to take lrt with classmates or seniors
i like to take train to go back
though is suffering,
i wholeheartedly like this task
"instead of saying tat is task,
it is a must!if nt,i've no transport to go back."

i like to study at here,
but,
i din own sth special amogst them.
quite a,
aversion toward myself.
why m i nt owning any ability to study.

those 6 sub...
i can't handle well.
is it because i'm too lazy,
r too stupid?
lazy?
i think yes.
i missed those days tat i always scold chiah yeh n poh ye...
always remind them
they r wering the white long pants n black shoes indeed.
i missed wat'd weng cheong told me:
let us c who will save u after you reach there.
(indeed, he lost, cuz everyone at here is very generous!!!)

going to attend a camp during next tuesday~
is it excited?
i do not noe.
but, i noe.
i will miss the chance to go to UM tml wif my classmates.
i love to b wif my classmates,
very much^^
haiz!!!

hw could i survive????

Xx...thx for U6W...xX

u guys r really kind a..
generous person...
gave me a lot of free sign,
thx~~^^

==========================
好久没有被鼓掌了，
自从，
627之后。
没有虚伪的接受掌声，
谢谢你们。

这是一种叫满足感的心情。
这是一种叫喜悦的心情。
这是一种叫欣慰的感觉。
我喜欢这种感觉。

兴许，
之前，
我也有经验过，
但是，
这是多久的错觉了？

如今，
回头想想，
真的，
蛮久了。
快一年有余了。

相信自己，
将会在新的环境，
产生全新的自己，
让自己更加成熟，
更加稳重~

Xx...没有灵感...xX

这几天，
情绪低落。
正是要XXX的前景。
要随身准备好了。

这几天，
觉得东西作不完，
可是，
却不像以前，
就是说，
每天今日事今日毕。

有时，
想找点时间给自己。
可是，
这时候，却没有时间给自己。
不是不给自己，
而是，
自己不能给自己。

想要上网玩game，
可是，
脑海却告诉我不能，
想要给自己大睡，
脑海，
也是告诉我，
不能。

那就看看书吧，
让自己的心境平衡点。
我看了几面的倾听（YH中六生的文集）
看了他写的东西，
想起我和他
从小的时候，
这一切的回忆。
与他常常拌嘴，
竞争，
想起当时他父亲去世，
他落魄的表情。
这一切，
历历在目。

啊~这一切，
过得好快，
以前一年级到六年级的回忆，
现在，
回来了。

==============
该回去书前，
努力了。
bio phy chem!
我一定会努力努力努力！！！！

Xx...消失的心...xX

没有想到，一瞬间，
什么都没有了。
这颗心，
到底意味着什么？
我也不知道。

有些事情，
是应该躲在后面，
不再出现了的。
可是，
为什么？
出现了？

我，不知道。

Xx...take a deep breath...xX

huh....
ha......

let me take a breathe...
ok?

Xx...大喇叭...xX

>这篇是写给你的哦~
就是知道你看不懂华语，
所以我就用华语写咯！
娃哈哈哈~
反正你也看不到~

谢谢你，
教了我那位大姐要我做的task，
至少，
你会耐心告诉我，
听说，
你是不会那么容易教别人的哦~
太容易的东西你不说的~
哈哈~

而且，
有点hurt咧~
竟然说我是大喇叭！
哈哈，
我们认识多久哦~
竟然说我是大喇叭！！！
哼！！！

期待你星期一唱翻版校歌~
===============
我问我自己，
我真的是大喇叭？
我说话是大声了点啦...
可是,
不至于吧.

其实,
心里面,
想什么,
不知道.

Xx...差一点又哭了一大餐...xX

你们，都知道，
我容易哭。
我不坚强。
我不否认。

=============
今天，
在学校拿签名的时候，
我就很想很想大哭了。
因为，
这里是不熟悉的环境，
我忍。

最终，
还是顶不顺了，
上火车前，
去拿书包的时候，
流泪了。

真的，
从来没有那么无法释怀过，
从来没有那么怪自己那么笨，
虽然回到育华的时候，
我嘴里在骂，
其实，
我正在收藏自己的懦弱，
我正的被打击了，
我真的不知道，
什么是3 cycle of the plant...
还是什么的。

虽然eric有很快的解释，
可是，
我的脑，
永远接受不到这些东西。

有点后悔？
是吗？
我问我自己，
你后悔吗？
好像什么都跟不上，
现在又有一个活动突然打岔，
让我专心不到。

我发现自己，
真的变了，
我变得不像原本喜欢音乐的自己，
我已经不是自己了。
我失去自我了。

大哭吧？
那原本的自己，
会回来吗？
无法释怀。
因为答案是不。

Xx...i m going to b 18 after half an hour time!!!...xX

time past in a twinkling of eyes.
quite surprised when i've discovered i m going to turn as 18-years-old by half an hour time.
this is no surprise at all indeed!
it's juz a symbol tat tell me...
hey, u r getting older n older now!
OMG!

====================

between these days,
i've realised,
actually,
i'd learnt a lot of things.
i've learnt hw to face myself.
the most important phase ws,
i noe hw to tell myself,
wat should i choose in spite of sth which is resembles as a significant subject.

n also,
start fr yesterday onwards...
i left my band formally,
this is the phrase tat i could rmb for now.

when i were thinking back events tat happen around merely this half year,
wat i could say,
is just sorry.
sorry to my band,
sorry to my parents,
sorry to many many ppls.
this is wat i could say.
especially for my band.

indeed,
i love them more than myself.
i confess,
it will nvr less than anyone.
but, i m the one who always break the rules,
give too much bout my views...
being a selfish person,
being a Coward...
always hv made mistake....
quite annoying, rite?
this is the way i could show my love...
n bury the aversion toward sth.

time past,
n they juz finished their 09/10-10/11 agm.
it's quite a surprising name list.
that's wat i could say.
creative makes improvement, i think. XD

i would like to tell sb,
indeed,
u might nt accept,
but u will discover sth.
if u really hv done ur responsibilities after someday.
i could nt give u neither consolation nor hug,
i merely hv a wish,
in my heart deeply.
i would tell u,
"it's a secret."
if u want to noe it so.
tat's still a secret though u beg me to tell you~

now, i've left only 20 minutes to become 18.
really,
i love to tell myself.
"u've overcome a lot of plights.
u r more mature now, bcuz,
u hv noe ur direction now."
ya, my aim nw.
catch up the syllabus.
=============================

for my 18th birthday,
i received 2 present earlier.
a photo frame with a photo which i was holding soprano sax,
fr my dear juniors~
n another one.
a mosquitoes repeler,
fr sax section of HYYB.
guys, this is the most valuable gift tat i'd received b4.
appreciate it much!

thx.....
n wish me...
myself...

happy 18 birtday~
^^i'm an adult after 14 minutes~
happy birthday~

Xx...endless work...xX

i've tried to relax fr the stack of homework indeed~^^
such a naughty girl, rite?
start to play without finishing homework.
haha~juz ignore those homework for 15 min^^
i'll b obedient after playing n surfing net^^
i felt my appearance is really important after joining mbs...
as..
i'm nt clever or hardworking as others~
haha~
but, i do try my best to finish my things.

i love my chemistry teacher the most^^
i've never met such a good and responsible teacher as her~
indeed, felt thankful to her,
as she is so good to us^^

such a pressure to study at there
but i've really enjoyed my class indeed.
my classmates r quite nice,
teachers r gud n funny，
i think,
i've ad adapted this enviroment.

i was missed my previous school sometimes.
wat i missed is those classmates,
especially zhi qian,chiah yeh,weng cheong,hui ni,
song guang,ah mok, qiao wei, teck wai...
now i realize,
i depend u guys lot!
especially chiah yeh n weng cheong.
i'm so miss u all when i duno hw to solve maths n chemis question,
cuz i m the one who always kacao u all.
rite^^
how bout u guys??
do u guys miss me??
haha~

indeed,
it will b alright in no time.
i do believe in myself
n also believe in u guys.
thx for ur previous days accompaniment.
i appreciate this indeed.
love u guys, always.

my classmates also nt bad
they'll teach me when i duno~
^^thx to them also~
================
okok~~~
stop writing nonsense~
i'll go to bed soon.
meet u guys in my dream~

Xx...orientation month...xX

quite a bz month,
all of the lower 6 student are needed to take signature fr our upper 6 senior's signature,
haha,
a creative event.
seniors do give us task in order to gt their sign.
OMG...
magic words,
school song,
decorate,
walao...
so many task to do u noe.

Luckily xiao chun helps me lol^^
wakaka~
but hoh...
gt a senior hoh,
gave me a maths question
(the ice)'s question...
er, dun really noe hw to solve,
but nvr min
i do~
it's for my own good~
wakaka~

Evevrything will b alright in no time.
I do believe this.
=================

心不知不觉地抽痛，
那是因为，
在努力忘记你的同时，
我也变得不像自己。
我很努力，
我不想给你我困扰，
就让我一个人活在记忆里吧。

Xx...142th day...xX

142天了，
时间过得好快。
喜欢你的日子，
也来去匆匆。

好久没有那么想你，
在上化学的时候，
有点想你，
变成重点没有听到。
结果，
老师说我如果不明白要问。

真的，
就这样，
在新学校过了一个星期。

===============
在新学校，
生活，
还过得去啦~
不过，
功课就多咯，
没有办法，
突然插进去。

就变成一开始跟不上，
可是，
过了2天，
就能适应到，
那里的生活了。

其实，
换换新环境，
让自己忘记一些事情，
是不错的。
=================
爱上你，
就像上错了火车一样，
到的地方也不对。

爱上了错的人，
爱上一个不爱自己的人，
就像失去了重心的火车。

对不起，
我会学会忘记这一切，
不给你带来困扰。